GREETINGS

Hello All,

My fellow bloggers and followers, I apologize for not being true to my word. Like I’ve written countless number of times, I’m suppose to update you all on the regular but for some reason/excuse or the other it happens ever so infrequently. You’re probably sick of hearing the same old apology after another, so I’m going to cut right to today’s post.

Has anyone heard of…? This appalling story of a man that sneezed and died…

Ok… So this is what really happened. This man dies after massive sneeze triggers brain hemorrhage and heart attack. Strange, huh.. It’s amazing, the unbelievable stories you hear these days. It’s more amazing that this is the first “death by sneezing” case e-v-e-r. Please, let me know if you’ve heard of something similar. This 79 year old retired design engineer, John Oram had a heart condition and suffered from diabetes. He also was taken Warfarin, a drug which thins the blood. The unfortunate incident happened July 16, 2009 were he was seen to have had a very violent sneeze. Medical records show that the violent sneeze combined with the Warfarin could have been the cause of his death. Also, the cause of the death was subdural hematoma (trauma of the brain) and coronary artery disease. Now, don’t be fooled and think that just because the man was old, coupled with artery disease and Warfarin that this story is not a shocker, because it is! Why? Medical records done with intense research shows that you’re probable to fall into harms way or death if you hold back a sneeze. no matter what age you are Yes, true and darn right scary. My prayers go out to his family and friends.

Monday morning (huge sigh), like the guy next door… I’m wishing its Friday morning instead. Today, I woke up with immense doubts in my mind about everything. Who do you trust 100%, I mean someone who you can share every and anything with? Excluding the persistent nagging, need I say annoying doubts in my mind - a friend revealed something to me? While running cruisecontrol, correcting errors on project cfb, which has somehow failed to corporate like the remaining 34 other projects I started chatting with my high school friend. He’s been seeing this girl, since like forever (he’s past the stage in his relationship were, when they see him they assume she’s with him. When she’s not with him or he’s not with her, noisy people are looking at them with askance thinking something bad has happened). The conversation started out when he asked me if I will be returning to commence NYSC soon? I’m assuming with excitement in his mind that his NYSC is approaching a fast paced end; he’s at the stage where he’s trying to convince me to get it over with. Then he suddenly started asking when he’ll be wearing my ashwebi, I’m like seriously dude I’m only 21. Just like me, I decided to twist the direction of our conversation to him… I assumed that if anything he would be the one heading in that direction first. After explaining how he wanted to be financially stable before dwelling into marriage and the likes. I then asked if she was who he wanted to be with (marriage-wise) or if he was still searching. To very little surprise he replied “can’t say”… I’m thinking what the heck does that mean… shouldn’t his reply have been yes definitely. Before I digress, I pursued a better response, then he said – “i wuldnt just see smethin else nd leave my gurl lyk dat. smethin has to happen to mke me leave my gurl” and “she's wife material, but u hv anyone for me?” Those were his exact words…

That got me thinking ohhh… After 3 years and there’s no assurance that the relationship is heading towards marriage, then I strongly believe you’re wasting time, effort and energy. Talk less about 4, 5, 6 years plus.. That’s suicidal.

Anyhoo.. has anyone seen Jamie Fox’s new movie “Law Abiding Citizen”, it’s really good, smart and full of excitement. It will definitely keep you on your toes. I also want to see "The Blind Side" and of course "New Moon"

So, I’m heading back to WORK (oh boy) - so i can head out on time ...

BTW – Check out the knock knock poetry by Daniel Beaty, it’s heart-warming.

"I always arrive late at the office, but I make up for it by leaving early."
— Charles Lamb

KNOCK KNOCK

NEW TACTICS

Someone shared the following cases:

1.  Today I passed by a building which has an ATM machine. There was a man looking at me. Suddenly, he called me. He said he didn't know how to read, so he gave me his ATM card and asked me to help him withdraw money from the ATM machine. I answered 'NO!! If you need help, ask the security guard. Then he said 'never mind..' and continued to find other people to help him... REMEMBER: ATM machines have CCTVs. If you help him he will later claim that you have robbed him or stolen his ATM card. Besides, his ATM card could be a stolen one.

So please be careful of these tactics.

2.  Suddenly your house lights go off. From your window you find that your neighbors still have lights. So you go out of your house to check the Meter Box. But once you open the door, a knife will be pointing at you and preventing you from closing it. This is when you will be robbed and injured.

REMEMBER: Even though your electricity suddenly goes off, DO NOT open the door immediately. Look around to see if there is anything unusual or if there is any noise around.

3.  This is another incident. You may have heard it before, it is about a lady who she saw a kid crying by the roadside. When she spoke to the kid, the kid told her he was lost and wanted her to take him home and gave her a paper with his house address. So she took him home. But when she rang the door bell, she had an electric shock. Later when she woke up, she was naked in an empty room.

REMEMBER: Being such a compassionate and helpful person might not be a good thing these days. Pass this on and girls, please be careful.. DON'T BE TOO KIND!!

4.  One day, there was an old lady outside my house holding 2 packets of sweets. At first I thought she was our neighbor and wanted to give us these packs of sweets as a gift. But then when she spoke, I realized that she was foreigner. I could not understand what she was talking about. I guessed she must be asking for money.I sensed there was something wrong and immediately closed the door and ignored her. Later, I found she and an accomplice robbed someone else down the road.

5.  I was at the ATM machine to withdraw some money. Behind me, there was an old lady. She asked me whether I was able to withdraw my money because she said she had problem with her machine. Suddenly a small girl came up beside me. The small girl went in front of me. I thought she was just naughty and playful. But then, the small girl put her hand at the tray of the ATM machine where the money comes out, ready to take away my money. I sensed something was wrong and immediately pushed her away. Later I realized that the small girl and the old lady worked together. She was trying to steal my money while the old lady was trying to distract my attention by asking me questions! REMEMBER: BE VERY CAREFUL when you are at an ATM machine and be alert. Look out for anyone suspicious around you!
 
6.  My parents are retired and stay at home most days. One afternoon, a young stranger went to their house and said his motorcycle had no more petrol and the petrol station was too far for him to push his bike there. So he asked my parents for an empty coke bottle to buy some petrol. He said he will pay P50 for the bottle. So my mum took one coke bottle for him. He really took out the money from his pocket, but it was a P1000 bill. He told my mum he had no small change and asked my mum to give him the change. Luckily my mum was smart. She just gave it for free. REMEMBER : obviously that bill is fake!! Who would want to pay for P50 for an empty coke bottle!! It's very OBVIOUS that that stranger is a trickster.

7.  This happened in Bali. A newly married couple were having their honeymoon at the hotel. When both are in the changing room, the wife suddenly went missing. The husband was very anxious and went around to find her. He asked the hotel staff to help him find her. Then he thought his wife was just playing hide and seek. So he went back and waited for his wife. After a few hours, he decided to call the police. 3 weeks passed and there was still no news about his missing wife. So he went back and was very disappointed and sad. A few years later, he came back to Bali , to watch a 'FREAK SHOW' in an old house. He saw a dirty and rusty metal cage. Inside there was a lady without limbs. Her body including the face was full of scars. When he had a closer look at her face, he was shocked to find that it was his missing wife put there as a means for begging.
 
8.  This happened in Shanghai . A few years ago, a lady reported to the police that her cousin sister was missing in the shopping complex. But after 5 years, one of her friends found her cousin sister begging at the road side on one of the streets in Bangkok , Thailand . The worst thing is that her cousin sister has no more limbs and her body was tied to a lamp post with a shackle (metal chain).
 
9.  Let's just shorten this story. DO NOT open your house door when you hear the sound of a BABY CRYING!! It might be a trap! Women in the house must be alert to this trick. The police said it is the work of a robber or murderer using the recording of a baby crying to attract your attention. This normally happens at night and when you are alone in the house.
 
10. I read an email that was sent by my friend. Her friend, known as A, went to Luo Hu Commercial City with 2 friends, B and C. Luo Hu Commercial City is the Shenzhen counterfeit goods distribution center. There are many people there. It's also near to the ShenZhen train station and Hong Kong 's Luo Hu Port. C went to the toilet at the shopping center while A and B waited outside. After waiting for a long, time they felt uneasy and went into the toilet to look for her. When they went in, there was nobody inside. Both were scared and they called C's phone. There was no reply. So they reported to the police. The police asked them whether they had seen anybody suspicious going into the toilet. Both said there were none and its impossible to bring a live person out of the toilet without them noticing!. Then A remembered seeing a cleaner pushing a trolley in, and then coming out. The police told them that was not the 1st time such a thing happened. The police suspected a gang of criminals who were always attacking women in the toilet of shopping complexes. They use cleaners to kidnap people to harvest their organs for sale.. REMEMBER: please be careful when using the toilet. Do not go to the wash room or toilet ALONE!! Please at least have a partner with you.

WANT TO TRY SOMETHING INTERESTING?!?

Its a riddle not a joke! 

Think of a number that is more than 1 but less than 10 Multiply this number by 2 Add on 5 Multiply your answer by 50 If you have had your birthday this year ADD 1759 If you haven't had your birthday this year ADD 1758 Now s...ub...tract the 4 digit year you were born, You are left with a 3 digit number. . . The first digit is the number you thought of and the next 2 digits are YOUR AGE!

PROUDLY NIGERIAN

You know you can always trust a Nigerian in situations like this.

Please read on and be proud of the “wisdom” God has given us.

An American lawyer and a Nigerian from Warri are sitting next to each other on a long flight. The lawyer is thinking that Nigerians are so
dumb that he could put something over on them easily...So the lawyer asks if the Nigerian would like to play a fun game.

The Nigerian is tired and just wants to take a nap, so he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks.  

 The American lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun.  

 I'll  ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer, you pay me only $5; then you ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I will pay you $500, he says.

This catches the Nigerian's attention and to keep the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.

The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's the distance from The Earth to the Moon?'  

 The Nigerian doesn't say a word, reaches in his pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the lawyer.

Now, it's the Nigerian's turn. He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with three legs, and comes down with four?'  

 The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all references he could find on the Net.

He sends e-mails to all the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour of searching he finally gives up.  

 He wakes up the Nigerian and hands him $500. The Nigerian pockets the $500 and goes right back to sleep.

The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He wakes the Nigerian up and asks, 'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and comes down with four?'

The Nigerian reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5 and goes back to sleep, pocketing $490. 

 Who says Nigerians are not intelligent?

ENLIGHTENED PERSPECTIVE

Please Read all the way to the bottom:

Written by Andy Rooney, a man who has the gift of saying so much with so few words.  

I've learned.... That the best classroom in the world is at the feet of an elderly person.

I've learned..... That when you're in love, it shows.

I've learned.... That just one person saying to me, 'You've made my day!' makes my day.

 

I've learned.... That having a child fall asleep in your arms is one of the most peaceful feelings in the world.

I've learned.... That being kind is more important than being right.

 

I've learned.... That you should never say no to a gift from a child.

I've learned.... That I can always pray for someone when I don't have the strength to help him in some other way.

I've learned.... That no matter how serious your life requires you to be, everyone needs a friend to act goofy with.

I've learned...... That sometimes all a person needs is a hand to hold and a heart to understand.

I've learned..... That simple walks with my father around the block on summer nights when I was a child did wonders for me as an adult.

I've learned.... That life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.

I've learned... . That we should be glad God doesn't give us everything we ask for.

I've learned.... That money doesn't buy class.

I've learned..... That it's those small daily happenings that make life so spectacular.

I've learned... That under everyone's hard shell is someone who wants to be appreciated and loved.

I've learned.... That to ignore the facts does not change the facts..

I've learned.... That when you plan to get even with someone, you are only letting that person continue to hurt you.

I've learned.... That love, not time, heals all wounds.

I've learned.... That the easiest way for me to grow as a person is to surround myself with people smarter than I am.

I've learned..... That everyone you meet deserves to be greeted with a smile.

I've learned.. That no one is perfect until you fall in love with them.

I've learned..... That life is tough, but I'm tougher.

I've learned..... That opportunities are never lost;

someone will take the ones you miss..

I've learned.... That when you harbor bitterness, happiness will dock elsewhere.

I've learned..... That I wish I could have told my Mom that I love her one more time before she passed away.

I've learned.... That one should keep his words both soft and tender, because tomorrow he may have to eat them.

I've learned..... That a smile is an inexpensive way to improve your looks.

I've learned..... That when your newly born grandchild holds your little finger in his little fist, that you're hooked for life.  

I've learned..... That everyone wants to live on top of the mountain, but all the happiness and growth occurs while you're climbing it.

I've learned.... That the less time I have to work with, the more things I get done.

To all of you...... Make sure you read all the way down to the last sentence.

A HUSBAND WORKING ABROAD WROTE TO HIS WIFE

Dear Sweetheart,

I can’t send your allowance from my salary this month because the Global market crisis has affected me, so I am sending 100 kisses.

Your loving husband, B

His wife replies;

Sweetheart Dearest,

Thanks for the 100 kisses. Find below is the list of expenses I paid with the Kisses………

1.    The Milk man agreed on 2 kisses for one month’s milk

2.    The electricity man agreed not to disconnect us for only 7 kisses

3.    Your landlord comes everyday to take 3 kisses instead of the rent

4.    The Supermarket owner did not accept kisses only, so I gave him ‘other’ items. Hope you understand?

5.    Other miscellaneous expenses amount to 40 kisses

Please don’t worry about me, I have a remaining balance of 35 kisses and I should be able to manage till the end of the month with the balance.

Shall I plan the same for next month? Please Advice

Your ever loving Sweet Heart, J

9 Bangkok restaurants with monster views and killer menus | CNNGo

9 Bangkok restaurants with monster views and killer menus | CNNGo

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DYING TO LIVE

IF I REALLY WANTED TO TALK ABOUT IT… (I would say do you have all day)

If I really wanted to talk about it… I would say I’m so pissed because gay actions are what you make of it.

If I really wanted to talk about it... I would say it’s just a joke don’t be humiliated because of a simple joke.

If I really wanted to talk about it… I would say in a minute I’m capable of doing the unthinkable so don’t push me.

If I really wanted to talk about it… I would say who the heck are you to feel embarrassed, you can’t be new.

If I really wanted to talk about… I would say jealousy is an ugly thing but I guess we all can’t help it.

If I really wanted to talk about… I would say don’t be blinded by pretence or you’ll end up digging your own grave.

If I really wanted to talk about it… I would say I keep giving while you sit pretty taking.

If I really wanted to talk about… I would say check the definition of a mobile phone, was it like this last year.

If I really wanted to talk about… I would say the abyss of time has contaminated my memory, when did this start?

If I really wanted to talk about it… I would say maybe later ...
….. because no I don’t really want to talk about it!

HAPPY MONDAY EVERYONE

Ok… so my birthday was FUN, actually it was exactly what I wanted thanks to bf and of course my little sis. It started out with a delectable meal, good drinks and a vivacious crowd. I will definitely update you before the week runs out on the series of events that took place last Saturday.

…. So I still can’t believe I got my first ticket on my birthday. Literally I didn’t get it “ON” my birthday; I noticed it on my birthday. Ok, so I was just looking through the mail I had picked up on Wednesday when I noticed a mail from DMV (Department of Motor Vehicles). I immediately started thinking… my car stickers, tags and what-not are all up-to-date so what could this be. Only for me to open the letter with askance and find out it was a ticket (failure to stop at a red light). I vividly remember that unfaithful day when friends from out of town came to visit, and of course we could not sit our behind at home so we decided to go out and party. The day is coming back to me like it was just yesterday; while driving down the streets of the capital in search of a lounge/club - of which I can’t even remember the name, confusion was at its peak. In the midst of listening to the deafening music, understanding the direction of the navigation system and convincing my friend to put down my phone and concentrate solely on one gps, this led me to a $150.00 ticket. Yes… a sad truth, the hilarious part is that apparently I had not responded to the ticket they allegedly sent me 30 days ago, so they doubled my fine. I refuse to taint my exceptional driving record, so before I completed the letter without any postponement I went online to pay the fine.

Yes… that’s what $150.00 could buy… darn the roads of DC!

"If the law imposed the death penalty for parking tickets, we’d not only have fewer parking tickets, we’d also have much less driving. "
— Lawrence Lessig (Free Culture: The Nature and Future of Creativity)

IT'S MY CELEBRATION

Happy Belated Nigerians Independence Day :-)

Wow, this week went by so fast. It's an unfortunate twist of fate because the weekend will go by faster. Seriously, is it me or are there just not enough hours in the day? Maybe just maybe i'm not utilizing my time efficiently. Seriously "Yet another Friday" wow, that's about all I can say. I have been looking forward to Saturday for about 20 years (wow two whole decades) and now I feel like I don't want it come. Why? Because the closer it comes, the closer it is to being over. Well as they say all good things must come to end. It’s a sad truth.

So Nigeria is 49 and nothing has changed. Oh “no” “no” wait, we do have cinemas that play movies from last season, overpriced restaurants, extremely costly shopping centers, and expensive operas. Who needs the steady supply of primary human needs like electricity, water, security, shelter and food? What do we need all that for? hiissssss I’m going to leave the problems and prospects of my country for another day.

So, I’m trying and have been for the past few days to find a solution to this problem at work. How to create a loop to continue its build process on cruisecontrol upon an error? I do know that it requires a FailOnError plugin, which should be set to false but for some annoying reason it’s still not producing build results. So instead I tried a haltonFailure plugin, set it too false in the cobertura maven plugin and still nothing. Please, somebody let me know where my problem lies. I’ll really appreciate it.

Moving on to another subject! A couple of months back I downloaded over a dozen CD’s to my car, I got tired of looking for a particular CD while driving so I invested the time. It took me about a trip (1hr 10mins) from my workplace to my place to record about 10 CD’s. Yes, the thing is pretty fast… anyhow… I’ve had Asa’s CD for about 2 years and just came across her album as one of the CD’s I downloaded just yesterday. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve heard her songs play in the background … but never paid attention until yesterday. I’m in love with Jailer and Subway… yes my sister was telling me it’s old and all that. To me it’s the latest record, her melody is so unique – you won’t even know she’s a Nigerian. Who said we Africans don’t have talent when it comes to music. I absolutely love her songs, take a listen.

It’s Friday enjoy it and celebrate this Saturday on my behalf….

"Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You."
— Dr. Seuss (Happy Birthday to You!)